Lessons learned

How much do you look like Jesus? My three year old step-son Lance got me to thinking about that question today.

This weekend we had a powerful drama in our services in which Jesus was portrayed in the traditional first century garb.

He saw the drama during rehearsal this morning and only had one question for me: "Why is Jesus here at church?" Tyler, my six year old stepson had the answer - "It's not really Jesus. Just some guy that looks like him."

Just some guy that looks like him. It got me to thinking. How many people were present this weekend that looked like Jesus? How much do I look like Jesus?

Ya think we were tired?

My husband and I had dinner plans last night. Too bad we both fell asleep on the couch at 6:30 and didn't wake up until 10:00 pm. We just scratched dinner altogether and crawled into bed. Unfortunately Mark had to get up and go to work at dark-thirty - but I was blissfully asleep until 9:00 am this morning.

Ah, sleep.

I have been thinking a lot lately about writing a book about Step-Parenting. Granted, I have not held the title all that long - but it's one of those trial by fire things. You learn a lot in a short amount of time.

In my opinion (and since this is my book it gets to be all about my opinion!!), I think the number one scariest and most frustrating thing about step-parenting is loneliness. Very briefly, this is why I think that...

Step-parenting is hard. Every single day you have thoughts and emotions (not all bad ones, but a barrage of them nonetheless) that you don't know what to do with. Some that you think are too horrible to say out loud. Some that you think no one else on the planet must have ever thought about step-parenting. Image management keeps you from talking about them with others - especially your spouse. And so you are prone to getting trapped in this self-made box of loneliness.

I know I have had experiences talking to other step-parents where I find out that "oh my gosh. They have some of the same thoughts that I do. Cool. I'm not the only one."

I want to write the book not because I think I have great or new things to say. I want to write the book so someone can read it and think, "Praise God that I am not the only person to have ever experienced this." There is comfort in knowing that you are not alone.

I have a GREAT title: "Try Not To Pee On Your Children - and Other Life Lessons Learned as A Step-Parent."

Catchy...isn't it??

Perhaps it deserves a little explanation.

Dogs mark their territory by peeing on things. Hydrants, bushes, couches...whatever. They put their scent on things so that when another dog walks by they will smell the other dogs pee and know that dog has been there. I have observed that parents can be the same way. They don't literally pee on their children, but they mark their territory in other subtle ways. I think on of the greatest gifts a step-parent can RECEIVE is when both natural parents give their children permission to love the step-parent with a wild abandon. In essence, when they do not pee on their children.

Mark's ex-wife Lisa is actually really great at this. She gives both Lance and Tyler permission to love me. One of the greatest moments for me as a Step-parent was a direct result of this. We were dropping the kids off at Lisa's and I was sitting in the car. Long story short Lisa came out to say hi to me and the kids followed her outside. Lance opened the car door, and climbed up into my lap to give me a hug goodbye. In front of his mom. That might not seem like a big deal if you aren't a Step-parent...but trust me when I say it is!

Anyway, the book is mostly percolating in my brain right now. One of these days I will put it to paper.

mmm mmm good...

I love muffins. And lately I have been in the mood to make some. I came across a recipe for Banana Muffins and Apple Streusel Muffins that I thought I would share.

The Banana Muffin recipe I found on the Internet. I admit I changed it a little...I added brown sugar, vanilla and chocolate chips to the recipe and they tasted...well...tasty!

Banana Muffins (makes 12 muffins)
1 1/2 Cups All-Purpose Flour
3 large bananas mashed
1 tsp Baking Powder
3/4 cup sugar (1/2 white, 1/2 brown sugar)
1 tsp Baking Soda
1 Egg
1/2 tsp Salt 1/3 cup butter, melted (you can sub 1/2 cup applesauce for healthier muffins!!)
1/2 tsp Vanilla chocolate chips (optional)

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Coat Muffin pans with non-stick spray, or use paper liners. Sift together the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside.
2. Combine bananas, sugar, egg, melted butter (or applesauce), vanilla in a large bowl. Fold in flour mixture until smooth. Scoop in muffin tins.
3. Bake in preheated oven 25-30 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean.


My Aunt Karen writes and published cookbooks. I was flipping through one of them the other day and came across this Apple Streusel Muffin Recipe. Turns out that it was my grandmother's recipe (she died about 10 years ago of breast cancer.) These are a lot more work than the banana muffins - but really good!

Apple Streusel Muffins (makes 12 muffins)
1 1/2 cup flour
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup sour cream
1/4 tsp allspice
2 large eggs
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 cup margarine, melted
2 tsp baking powder
1 cup apple, diced
1 tsp cinnamon

Preheat oven to 400. Mix flour, sugar, allspice, salt, baking powder, cinnamon and baking soda in large bowl. In another bowl, combine sour cream, eggs, butter and apple; blend well. Pour over dry ingredients and mix only until moistened. Spoon into muffin pans. Top with streusel topping and bake for about 20 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean.

Streusel Topping
1/2 cup chopped nuts
2 tbs margarine
1/4 cup flour
1/4 tsp cinnamon
3 tbs sugar

Combine all ingredients together and mix until crumbly.

Both muffins are delicious. I doubled each recipe because 12 muffins would not last 12 minutes in my house...

Enjoy!

Home Sweet Home

I really love our house. I love where it is. I love that it is something tangible that Mark and I can change and adapt to meet our family needs.

But I really love our view. Late last week it rained - and this is what greeted us in our front yard...